Can't Take Me Home
by Atsuhita
Summary: The redheads of Weiß and Schwarz are causing trouble in the pet store...


Can't Take Me Home - by Atsuhita

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Hola! I'm sure alot of you are grieving through finals and don't have time to read a super-long fic, so here's is my gift to you to provide a mini-break from your stress. (I feel your pain as I am also greuling through them.)

Wihtout furthur ado...here is fanfic number three! This one you're sure to like! Please read and review; tell me what you think!

WARNINGS: Characters might be OOC, suggestive scenes and dialogue, crude language.  
NOTE: /.../ = Schuldich speaking telepathically

Please visit my website: http://www.firecrackersweet.com

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"I'm going to the pet shop." The fiery redhead adjusted his jacket and wandered away from Brad Crawford.

"What the hell are you talking about, Schuldich?" The American sneered, watching his teammate wander away.

"I'm going to the pet shop. I want to pick out a pet to play with."

"You're crazier than Farfarello, Schu."

Schuldich just laughed. "Farf's not crazy, he's psychotic."

The one-eyed man just stared at Nagi, who was deciding between a copy of Final Fantasy 9 or Devil May Cry.

"Same thing. You're making no sense, ya idiot."

"Whatever. I'm not wasting my day waiting for the brat to find his computer game."

With that, Schu exited the electronics store and wandered down the crowded hallways in the shopping mall, a certain location clear in his mind.

/I know the one that I want. I've been admiring it every time I come here, and today is the day I will take it home with me./

---

"Found your stupid shirt yet, Yo-tan?" Ken muttered, sitting on a chair near the dressing room.

"It is not a stupid shirt! What do you know about fashion? Adidas can kiss my ass." Yoji growled, his body hidden behind the door of his changing area.

"Don't swear, Yo-tan! People will stare!"

"Bullshit."

"Yoji-kun!"

"....b-b-b-b-bullshit." This was becoming a game.

"YO-TAN!"

Aya sighed, and started to walk away.

"Hey! Aya! Where're ya going?"

"I'm just gonna walk around. I'll meet you at the fountain in an hour." He disappeared into the crowds.

"...bullshit..."

---

Schuldich stood in front of the pet store, eyeing the dogs and cats in the display. Some were playing, some fighting,...others eating and sleeping.

"Hello little ones...have you seen my friend today?" Schu thought to himself as he stepped closer to admire the animals.

Aya, unaware or the Schwarz member nearby, casually entered the pet shop. Schuldich felt another person's presence, and slipped into the store as well.

"Hi." Aya greeted the saleswoman with a gentle smile. She, in return, grinned back.

"Looking for anything special?"

"No. I'm just looking."

Schuldich looked in Aya's direction; the redhead was hiding behind a display of guinea pigs.

/Ahhh....he is nearby....I know he is. So adorable and precious. I must make him mine./

Aya perked up, listening to a voice speaking only to him.

/I've come to take you home with me, little Abyssinian./

"What?" Aya jerked, scaring the old man standing near him. He blushed and apologized, then made his way towards the back.

/Don't be shy, kitten. Come see me./

"Who's? Schuldich? No way! It can't be!" Aya quickly darted down one aquarium-lined aisle and entered another, keeping watch of Schu through the glass tanks.

/Why are you running from me? I have lots of presents for you./

"Sick bastard!" Aya muttered, finally escaping the fish tanks, and immersing himself in the rodents' department.

/What a naughty kitten running loose...you don't want those icky little mice...I have something for you that tastes even better./

"Why is Schuldich hitting on me? Of all people? He senses my fear, and he knows where I'm going! This is nuts!"

Aya dashed across the tiled floor, running as fast as he could without causing a ruckus. A few people stirred, but he was pretty much to himself. When he got to the kitten displays, he found a storage unit under the lowest display and ducked inside, sliding the door shut and breathing quietly.

/Where are you? I know you're hiding from me. The pet shop is a scary place...I will protect you./

"Don't find me...don't find me..."

/I picked out a pretty collar for you to wear, it has your name on it, my name on it, and everything./

"He's insane..." Aya muttered, shuddering in his little nook underneath the mewwing kittens. They seemed shaken up as well.

/Please, come out little kitten...Daddy can't wait to take you home and pet you...and play with you...and feed you...and loooooovvvvveeee you..../ Schu purred as he picked Aya's brain.

Aya heard the footsteps come closer, and he shuddered even more. If he were armed he'd be fine, but he was only in the clothes he wore and had no source of weaponry to defend himself with.

The footsteps stopped in front on the display.

/Aha...I know you are here, come on out, baby. Come see Daddy./

Aya flipped the door open, wrapping his arms around Schuldich's legs and pulling him to the ground. The two redheads lay slightly hurt and sprawled out on the floor.

"STOP DOING THIS TO ME! YOU DO IT EVERYTIME!" Aya yelled at him as he staggered up.

"Huh?" Schudich blinked.

"Those stupid mind tricks won't work! I AM NOT YOUR KITTEN! I am straight! Hetero! Not gay!"

People in the nearby area stared.

"What are you talking about? I wasn't reading-" Schu stopped, and tilted his head back, roaring in laughter.

"Why are you laughing..." Aya growled.

"Oh man! I feel so stupid, but that is SO FUNNY! AHAHAHA!" He held his chest he was cracking up so hard.

"I didn't find it funny."

"You see, I thought I was channeling the kitten!"

"Kitten?"

"Yeah!" Schu grabbed the nearby dog food display and pulled himself up to his feet. "I'm here to buy a pet." He pulled a little red collar out of his pocket, and a little jingly bell hit against the shiny silver tag.

Aya leaned forard to read the engraving. "Scharf?!"

Schuldich tucked the collar away and reached into the display, pulling out a little Abyssinian kitten.

"Here you are, kitten. I'm here to take you home." Schudich stroked the kitten's head as it mewwed.

Ending all suspicion, Aya hung his head and wandered out of the store, back aching and brain slightly messed up. Maybe he'd go to bed early tonight...or just take a cat nap.

/Of course, Aya-baby, you can come over to play with the kitten whenever you want./

"SCHULDICH!!!"

The End


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